How can you attract men into your life if your life itself is in flux? Should you put your search for a great guy on hold, just to give yourself some time to become your best? That’s what Virginia wants to know.
April, I just picked up cold turkey and moved to my favorite place in Florida. I’m not situated yet with work and not at my ideal weight. I have three job interviews coming up, I’m eating healthy and getting into better shape. I feel that meeting a well-rounded successful man has to wait while I’m building my success in every area of my life. Otherwise, I won’t attract him. Is this true? It would be so nice to meet a man who can like, love and respect me as I am. Thank you for being you and for all that you share in this life.
Congratulations on your move, Virginia! First, I want to acknowledge you for being brave enough to change your life and move to a place that makes you happy. Many people have dreams of doing this but the fear of being unsettled stops them. Good for you!
Next, I want to tell you that your career (or anyone’s for that matter) doesn’t inspire respect, attraction and love from men. There are millions of women with successful careers who are still not getting the respect they want from men. The real reason is because that’s not how men respect women!
It’s how you treat yourself that resonates with men. If you respect yourself, men will follow suit. If you’re happy, they want to continue to make you happy.
When you say you want a man to like, love and respect you for who you are, then you need to know that your fitness and career are not who you are. Those are just parts of your life. Who you are goes much deeper than that.
The job and the ideal weight will come soon enough. So don’t take yourself off the market in the meantime! Instead, just focus on doing what you love, and be kind, gentle and patient with yourself while you pursue your own happiness.
All of It.
My suggestion? Get comfortable with the uncomfortable. So, you’re in between jobs and feeling a little out of sorts in your new city. Use it to your advantage! When you meet someone, tell them you’re excited about this new journey and trying new things! That alone will draw people (and yes, men) into your life. Be honest. Embrace and love your life.
If you feel okay about your choices and experiences, so will everyone else.