Date smart. Sign up for April's
advice in your inbox.

The Friday Takeaway: Ready for Me Time?

You made it. It’s Friday!

This weekend I’m doing something I never do…

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve adored my alone time. After family dinners, I would hightail it to my bedroom for hours of play, exploration and creativity. Not that I didn’t love my parents and siblings, I just liked being on my own. To me, this time was an opportunity to think, dream, write, listen and dance to music without my brothers making fun of me. (They were boys; of course they loved to tease me! “Look at April dance, she’s such a dork.”)

This weekend, I haven’t scheduled anything. I don’t even have plans to see my friends. And my husband has business partners in town and will be busy with them.

So I’m having an “April” weekend, filled with quality “me time” — and I’m inviting you to do the same. It’s easy to spend so much time and energy on others that you end up being the one who’s left feeling depleted. You can also spend a great deal of your life searching for love, whether that be going out hoping to meet someone or sitting in front of your computer while dating online.

Time to take a break from everyone and everything, and spend some time nourishing your spirit, while giving your brain a break. Even the most well-meaning friends can get in the way of your growth and self exploration, so my advice is not to rush to the phone today to get your plans in order. Instead, this weekend plan to turn the phone off and dial in to yourself.

Here’s how to get started:

First — Crank up the stereo, dance around the living room (no one’s going to be watching so feel free to do the April dork dance) to your favorite music. Then go for a long walk instead of heading for the gym. The idea here is to relax in a different way — one that only involves you, your body, your own breath, and your own thoughts.

Next — Take a notepad or a journal (not your laptop) and write down 10 things you learned from your last relationship. What did you learn about yourself? What qualities did he have that you need in your next relationship? What did you discover that doesn’t work for your type of personality? Can you add anything that you’re grateful for? You’ll only be able to move on and find love if you have gratitude for your past relationships. This is not a list of blame; it’s about experience. Every relationship you’ve been in has been a valuable teacher no matter what happened or how it ended. Here, you simply want to reflect on how it shaped and educated you.

Finally — Follow that up with unstructured time doing only what you want to do, without thinking about relationships or dating. Just enjoy your time in the moment.

My purpose for giving you this exercise for the weekend is to get you out of the external search for a relationship, and all the frustration that can come with it. This will allow you to channel that energy for a greater and more effective purpose.

Friday takeaways are meant to keep you moving toward your future. I can’t do this without you! Your participation is vital, so keep these going each week by adding what you’re learning in the comments below. Did you try the exercise? What was your experience? The best way to improve all of our lives and help our fellow sisters is to communicate openly and honestly. You never know when another woman might benefit from your insights!

Like this article? Feel free to share with your pals on Facebook. My goal is to continue to build a community of incredible, like-minded women and support you in your growth and journey to love. Let’s do this together!

Have a gorgeous weekend.

Much love,

Leave Your Comment:

Or Comment Via Facebook: